Trusting in God
enough to trust in yourself
It seems that we often doubt our
intuition. We always know when someone or something isn't right or
good. But too often we find excuses to not listen to our inner voice
and ignore what God is speaking to us from within. I am guilty of
this act too many times to recount and too ashamed to do so. But
until I realized how to listen to myself I kept repeating the same
mistakes. I thought that was only a myth; but it's very true. You
continue to repeat the same “crazy” mistakes until you grow
enough and decide to look within and not blame others for what
happens.
I understand and accept that this is a challenging truth. No one wants to see their own flaws, but until you can accept, acknowledge and attempt to change or control your personal problems and issues you will continue to go through the same circle and wonder why things do not work. It's not pretty to look within and it's not easy to try and change yourself, but really – it's easier than trying to change someone else.
From a Psychological perspective, when you cannot change your environment, you change yourself and the people and things around you will change accordingly. Believe me I have struggled through this very situation. I have cursed out exes in my mind, but one day I thought back on what I told a 6th grade student I worked with. She was complaining that every school she attends the girls turn against her and how girls are so terrible. I told her “have you thought about what the same thing is at every school?'” I said “it's you... you have to look at what you are doing that makes everyone react the same way no matter where you go.”
It took several years of making the
same stupid mistake and not listening to my inner self to realize I
have to change the way I am so that others change the way they react
and treat me. This happened when I was turning 30 years-old. I had
several months of serious introspection. I took several half days to
spend time with myself and write about my feelings and realize my
anger, regrets and accept that it was me that had to change so that
things and people around me changed. This process took a great
deal of time, but when you begin to accept your imperfections and
learn to first accept, love, respect and cherish yourself will anyone
else begin to do the same.
Others will treat you the way you allow
them to and how you treat yourself and feel you should be treated.
So, begin the process of introspection, and begin to change yourself
instead of hoping others will change to conform to you. Realize you
are not perfect and accept and embrace your flaws; they will not be
seen as imperfections by someone who really wants to love and care
for you.
These words do not come from a blind or
judgmental place. These words come from deep within me through my
own process and realization of these “facts of life”. Love
yourself enough to know when someone isn't.
